This is a complete list of quotes spoken by Duke Nukem across various editions of Duke Nukem 3D:
- Aahhh... much better. (upon urinating)
- After a few days of R&R... I'll be ready for more action!
- Are you crazy? Is that your problem? (quoting Big Trouble in Little China)
- Bitchin'!
- Blow it out your ass! (quoting They Live)
- Boooorn tooo beee wiiiiiiild... (singing "Born To Be Wild" by Steppenwolf)
- Come get some! (quoting Ash from Army of Darkness)
- Come on! (triggered if the player has been idle for too long)
- Cool!
- Curiouser and curiouser... (upon discovering the non-Euclidean geometry of the courtyard on High Times)
- Damn....
- Damn!
- Damn it. (upon killing an innocent NPC)
- Damn, I'm good! (quoting Ace Ventura: When Nature Calls)
- Damn... I'm looking good! (upon seeing himself in a mirror)
- Damn, that was annoying! (upon destroying the animatronic mouse on Babe Land)
- Damn, that's the second time those alien bastards shot up my ride! (upon starting Movie Set)
- Damn, those alien bastards are gonna pay for shooting up my ride. (start of the L.A. Meltdown episode)
- Damn, you're ugly. (quoting Predator)
- Do, or do not. There is no try. (quoting Yoda)
- Die, you son of a bitch! (after defeating a boss, in reference to Jaws)
- Eat shit and die.
- Game over! (part of the ending sequence after completing Shrapnel City)
- Get back to work, you slacker! (upon seeing an office computer with Duke Nukem 3D on the screen)
- Get that crap outta here.
- Go ahead, make my day. (quoting Clint Eastwood's character Dirty Harry in the film Sudden Impact)
- Gonna rip 'em a new one.
- Groovy! (quoting Ash from Evil Dead 2: Dead by Dawn)
- Guess again, freak show. I'm coming back to town, and the last thing that's gonna go through your mind before you die... is my size-13 boot! (responding to a message from the Cycloid Emperor after defeating the Overlord)
- Hail to the king, baby! (quoting Ash from Army of Darkness)
- Harr matey, someone's gonna take a long walk off a short gang plank!
- Hassan chop! (referencing Ali Baba Bunny)
- Heh, heh, heh... What a mess! (after an enemy explodes)
- Hmm, book 'em, Danno! (quoting Steve McGarrett in Hawaii Five-O)
- Hmm, don't have time to play with myself. (upon examining a Duke Nukem II arcade machine)
- Hmm, I'm going in!
- Hmm, looks like I have the conn! (upon entering the Ready Room on Warp Factor)
- Hmm, my kind of party! I wish I had time! (upon discovering the pornographic actresses on XXX-Stacy)
- Hmm, that's one doomed space marine. (upon discovering the corpse of the Doomguy from Doom)
- Holy cow!
- Holy shit!
- I ain't afraid of no quake! (riffing on the Ghostbusters tagline, in reference to Quake by id Software)
- I guess he didn't escape from L.A.! (upon discovering the corpse of Snake Plissken from Escape from L.A.)
- I like a good cigar...and a bad woman...
- I should have known those alien maggots booby-trapped this sub.
- I think I'll climb aboard. (upon discovering the submarine on Death Row)
- I wish I knew how to quit you. (after defeating the Cycloid Incinerator)
- I wonder if the Siskova sisters still live here. Mmm... Natasha and Nastya. (making a double entendre from "siski," the Russian word for "boobs," upon entering the apartments on Red Ruckus)
- I'll be back. (quoting Arnold Schwarzenegger's line from The Terminator)
- I'll rip your head off and shit down your neck. (riffing on Gunnery Sergeant Hartman's line from Full Metal Jacket, upon confronting the Overlord)
- I'm back in the USSR, baby! (upon entering the street on Red Ruckus)
- I'm Duke Nukem, and I'm coming to get the rest of you alien bastards! (after defeating the Battlelord)
- I'm getting too old for this shit. (upon starting Alien World Order)
- I'm gonna get medieval on your asses! (referencing Marsellus Wallace's line from Pulp Fiction)
- I'm gonna kick your ass, bitch! (upon confronting the Alien Queen)
- I'm gonna put the smack dab on your ass!
- I'm gonna roast your nuts over an open fire, you flaming alien bitch. (upon confronting the Cycloid Incinerator)
- I'm not crying over this! (upon seeing the butchered dolphin on Shop-N-Bag)
- It's down to you and me, you one-eyed freak! (upon confronting the Cycloid Emperor)
- It's like déjà vu all over again! (after activating the switch inside the fountain on High Times)
- It's time to abort your whole freaking species! (after defeating the Alien Queen)
- It's time to kick ass and chew bubble gum... and I'm all outta gum. (quoting They Live, start of the Shrapnel City episode)
- Let God sort 'em out! (quoting advice given by the historical figure Arnaud Amalric during the Albigensian Crusade when asked by a crusader how to distinguish the Cathars from the Catholics)
- Let's rock!
- Looks like cleanup on Aisle Four.
- Looks like it's time for me to go postal!
- Looks like San Francisco is a sanctuary for illegal aliens. (upon starting Golden Carnage)
- Lucky son of a bitch.
- Mess with the best, you will die like the rest. (quoting Hackers)
- Mm. Smells like someone cut the fromage. (upon entering the street on Tour de Nukem)
- No way I'm eating this shit! (referencing Beavis and Butthead)
- Nobody jacks with our independence! (upon seeing a spaceship on a monitor at the end of Area 51)
- Nobody messes with my meat! (upon entering Animal Shelter next to Duke-Burger)
- Nobody steals our chicks... and lives! (start of the Lunar Apocalypse episode)
- Now this is a force to be reckoned with! (upon discovering Luke Skywalker's hanging corpse)
- Ooh, I needed that! (after recovering the player's health from below 25%)
- Ooh, that's gotta hurt. (in a sarcastic tone after blowing-up an enemy, possibly riffing on a line by Ash in Army of Darkness)
- Oh...your ass is grass and I've got the weed-whacker.
- Ready for action.
- See you in Hell!
- Shake it, baby! (after handing a girl money)
- Shit happens. (after stepping in alien feces, referencing a line from Forrest Gump)
- So help me Duke.
- Somebody's gonna freaking pay for screwing up my vacation! (at the start of The Birth)
- Someone's gonna ruin the soufflé. (upon reaching the end of the street on Tour de Nukem)
- Sometimes I even amaze myself. (quoting Han Solo)
- Staying alive, staying alive, la. (singing "Stayin' Alive" by the Bee Gees)
- Suck it down!
- Terminated! (upon discovering the crushed skeleton of the Terminator)
- That's gonna leave a mark!
- The fifth element is always Duke! (upon discovering the mirror on Mirage Barrage)
- They don't make 'em better than me!
- This really pisses me off!
- This is KTIT, K-Tit! Playing the breast- uh, the best tunes in town. (upon interacting with a microphone on Radio Station)
- Trippy. Next time I have... coffee... I better add some cream and sugar. (upon completing High Times)
- Ugh, this sucks. (upon dying)
- We meet again, Doctor Jones! (upon discovering the hanging corpse of Indiana Jones)
- What? There's only one of you?
- What are you waitin' for? Christmas? (triggered if the player has been idle for too long)
- What are you? Some bottom-feeding, scum-sucking algae eater?
- What we do in life, echoes in eternity. Here's your eternity, you alien bitch! (quoting Gladiator)
- Where is it?
- Who wants some? (quoting Ash from Evil Dead 2: Dead by Dawn)
- Whoa! That's some good... uh, coffee! (upon inhaling cannabis smoke on High Times)
- Why so serious... Sam? (upon discovering the corpse of Serious Sam)
- Woo-hoo!
- Yeah, piece of cake!
- Yippee-ki-yay, motherfucker! (quoting John McClane from Die Hard)
- Yo-ho-ho and a bottle of jack!
- You guys suck!
- You wanna dance? (after handing a girl money)
- You're an inspiration for birth control.
- You're pissing me off!
- You're the disease, and I'm the cure. (quoting Sylvester Stallone in Cobra)
- Your face, your ass. What's the difference?
- "No way. Not possible," they said. But it's true. (upon discovering the alien on High Times)
Video: All quotes with in-game footage